Coping with Being a Carer: A Compassion Focused Therapy Approach to Caring for Yourself
Book Details
- Publisher : Routledge
- Published : January 2027
- Cover : Paperback
- Pages : 310
- Category :
Forthcoming - Category 2 :
Counselling - Catalogue No : 98704
- ISBN 13 : 9781041136101
- ISBN 10 : 1041136102
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Coping with Being a Carer is a compassionate and supportive guide for unpaid carers on looking after their own wellbeing while they are caring for others. Written by a clinical psychologist with personal experience of caring for her husband after his stroke, the book combines a Compassion Focused Therapy approach with lived understanding of the challenges carers face.
The book seeks to support unpaid carers to feel less alone in their caring roles, and to find realistic ways to help themselves with their own wellbeing in the limited time they have available. It does not seek to tell carers how to be ‘good carers’, or how to look after the person receiving care; it is entirely focused on the needs of carers themselves. Focused on helping carers to build compassion for themselves, and understanding that the challenges they face are not their fault, the book explores topics including:
How compassion can support carers in facing the challenges of life
Managing exhaustion and burnout
Keeping hold of who we are while caring for someone else
Managing difficulties in the relationship with the person who is cared for
Loneliness and isolation
Loss, and adjusting to life being different than expected or hoped
This is essential reading for anyone who provides regular support to a family member or friend who needs help due to illness or disability. It is also a useful resource for anyone providing support to unpaid carers, or people who are cared for, including mental health, allied health and medical professionals.
Reviews and Endorsements
'Caring is one of our most important human capacities. It is fundamental to our survival, our evolution, and the development of social bonds that sustain individuals and communities. Caring is also central to psychological wellbeing, fostering meaning, connection, and resilience. Yet the act of caring is too often undervalued by society. Carers themselves are given the additional challenge to practice self care without support or a roadmap or how to go about this. In this incredible book, Laura Twist compassionately guides the reader through an exploration of how she personally and professionally uses and developed Compassion Focused Therapy principles and practices to help her, and others, cultivate both understanding and foster enhanced wellbeing. It is warm, compassionate, moving and joyful all rolled into one.'
Dr Mary Welford, Consultant Clinical Psychologist and Author of The Compassionate Mind Approach to Building Self-Confidence
'Being a carer can be one of the most significant and meaningful roles we ever take on in life. But it can also be one of the most emotionally and physically demanding and distressing. In this important and powerful book, Laura Twist combines her expertise as a clinical psychologist with her own lived experience as a carer to create a guide that is empathetic, reassuring, practical and hopeful. Grounded in Compassion Focused Therapy, this book offers carers not only understanding, but also the skills and encouragement to care for themselves alongside those they care for. Highly recommended!'
Dr Chris Irons, Clinical Psychologist and Director at Balanced Minds. Author of The Compassionate Mind Workbook and The Compassionate Mind Approach to Working with Difficult Emotions
'Finding oneself in a carer role can turn our lives upside-down, forcing us to navigate a range of tricky emotions and real-world challenges. Dr. Laura Twist has provided us with a powerful resource for working with this challenging reality. In this clear and descriptive book, Dr. Twist introduces readers to Compassion-Focused Therapy and provides a treasure-trove of examples of how it can assist them in working with the challenges of being a carer. I suspect readers will find themselves particularly appreciating the deep personal examples that demonstrate exactly how they might apply the material to their own lives, helping them care for themselves and others. I’ll definitely be recommending this book to the carers in my life.'
Russell Kolts, Professor of Psychology at Eastern Washington University and author of CFT Made Simple and The Anger Workbook
'Life as a carer can be incredibly demanding. For many carers, they find that this has become a label to be attached to them, that instead of being a wife, husband, partner, parent, son, daughter, sibling or other relative, they are now simply a ‘carer’. In this book Dr. Laura Twist looks at the person beyond the label, and talks powerfully about the importance of looking after your own needs as a carer, how to understand the complex emotions that this brings, and how to develop coping mechanisms.'
Austin Willett, CEO, Different Strokes
'Laura combines professional expertise with the lived experience of being a carer, bringing authenticity, insight, and honesty to every page. Written with carers' health and wellbeing at its heart, the book is easy to read and navigate. Although grounded in a Compassion Focused Therapy framework, it avoids therapeutic jargon and offers practical self-reflection exercises and wellbeing techniques. It thoughtfully explores the many emotional and practical challenges of caring, providing compassionate, accessible support for those who need it most.'
Stephanie Child, Carer Counselling Service Manager and Psychotherapist (MBACP)
'There are few roles in life more demanding, more loving or more invisible than that of being a carer. In this remarkable book, Laura Twist shines a compassionate light on the emotional realities of caring and, in doing so, offers something many carers have long been missing: permission to care for themselves with the same dedication they so readily offer to others. Drawing authentically on both her clinical expertise and her own lived experience, Laura has written a book of exceptional warmth, wisdom and humanity. She neither minimises the challenges of caring nor overwhelms the reader with them. Instead, she walks alongside them with compassion, helping them make sense of their emotional world while offering practical, evidence-based ways of navigating it. This is far more than a self-help book. It is a compassionate companion for those whose lives have been shaped by caring, reminding them that their own wellbeing matters too. Richly informed by Compassion Focused Therapy, it reflects the very best of what compassionate science can offer: not easy answers, but understanding, courage and hope. This book will comfort, educate and empower. It is an important contribution to the growing recognition of the emotional lives of carers, and I have no doubt it will become a trusted companion for many people navigating one of life’s most demanding and meaningful roles. Every carer deserves a book like this. Laura has written one. It deserves to find its way into the hands of every carer, and into the hands of those who care about carers.'
Dr Deborah Lee, Consultant Clinical Psychologist and Author of The Compassionate Mind Approach to Recovering from Trauma
Table of Contents
Dedication
Acknowledgements
Series foreword
The unique perspective
Part 1: Introduction
Chapter 1: Introduction
Chapter 2: Why Compassion? An Introduction to Compassion Focused Therapy
Part 2: Building Your Toolkit
Chapter 3: Understanding Emotions: The Three Systems Model of Emotions
Chapter 4: Building your Soothing System 1: Breathing, Senses, and Relationships with Others
Chapter 5: Building Your Soothing System 2: Soothing Imagery, and Overcoming Blocks to Soothing
Chapter 6: Building a Compassionate Relationship with Yourself
Chapter 7: Acknowledging Feelings about What is Difficult, and Practising Gratitude for What You Have
Part 3: Coping with Specific Difficulties
Chapter 8: Assertiveness: Asking for What You Need
Chapter 9: Grief, Loss, and Adjusting to Life Being Different than Expected or Hoped
Chapter 10: Exhaustion and Burnout
Chapter 11: Loneliness and Isolation
Chapter 12: Anxiety and Worry
Chapter 13: Shame and Self-Criticism
Chapter 14: Maintaining Your Own Identity and Managing Your Relationship with the Person You Care for
Part 4: What Next?
Chapter 15: Keeping it Going: Setting Intentions for the Future
Chapter 16: Further Resources and Reading
Chapter 17: Getting Help
Index
About the Author(s)
Dr Laura Twist is a clinical psychologist, compassion focused therapist, and cognitive analytic therapist specialising in adult mental health and staff wellbeing. Laura has also been a carer for her husband for over 10 years following him having a stroke.
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